If you have been reading my blog for any length of time you know about my sorted past with the law, see August 22, 2009.
Recently, while on my lunch break I was driving down Johnson Lane, the scene of the last crime. The sun was shining after a long gray spring, my window was down and summer music was playing on the radio. When, very unexpectedly, over the horizon came a law official. I immediately looked down at the speedometer and dang, it said 45mph! He made a "U-y" and turned on his lights.
The conversation went something like this:
"Ma'am, do you know why I stopped you?"
"Yes, I was going 45mph."
"Do you know the speed limit on this road?"
"Yes, 35mph, I've been picked up on this road before. I was daydreaming."
"Can I have your, license. registration and proof of insurance and I 'll just go back to my car."
Off he went. And I began "talking" to my Mom. (No, not on the cell - she's been dead for 12 years but I still talk to her and sometimes she answers!)
"Okay Mom you were right, today the jig's up."
"It's as good a day as any to get my first ticket. There is no escape, there is absolutely no way out of this ticket."
"My first ticket, and retirement all in the same year. Can I ask him for his picture without getting in trouble? Will he think I'm being flippant when I only want to document my first ticket for the blog?"
From the rear view mirror I saw the officer getting out of his car at that moment I decided if I was entering the world of crime I would be bold and ask for the photo.
"Okay Judith, today I'm going to give you a warning..."
"WHAT, I'VE NEVER HAD A TICKET!!"
"No, no, I'm giving you a warning not a ticket."
"I understand but I deserved a ticket and I've never gotten a ticket. Every time I get picked up I just get warnings!" (I wanted to add but didn't, "You've ruined my blog post - I was going to ask for your photo and everything!")
"Yes, I know you've never had a ticket, and that's why you're not getting one today. We want to remediate offenders but had you been a habitual offender I would have given you a ticket."
(Then Mom spoke: "THAT"S ENOUGH, BE QUIET! Smile nicely to the officer and thank him. Someday Judy, you are
going to get your due, you can't keep dodging these tickets with your
charm and sweet smile forever. but today you scored GIRL!")